A story released from the Detroit Independent News this week confirms 99.99% of America's suspicion that Kid Rock sucks. A study was conducted at the Grand Rapids Community College Institute of What Sucks (GRCCIWS) recently. The GRCCIWS reported to the Detroit Independent News that they analyzed each of Kid Rock's songs and found that they are actually all recycled from older songs and that they each really suck. Kid Rock recently appeared on the 700 Club to defend his coolness. Kid Rock states "I don't suck, actually I'm pretty darn cool, I think." Stories have been coming out steadily since the release of Kid Rock's "All Summer Long" that every time Kid Rock performs the "song" that Ronnie Van Zant (original lead singer for Lynard Skynard" rises from his grave and shoots himself in the head. Although Kid Rock has not formally apologized to the Van Zant family, a spokesman for Kid Rock reportedly spoke with the family on the matter. I tried to reach Kid Rock for comment yesterday. His manager told me that "The Kid was really busy out being totally RAD, and that he would pass on the message." As of 9:42pm, March 18, 2009, I have not heard from "The Kid." I guess being totally RAD takes up a lot of time.
This story was written while enjoying the fresh taste of Spartan Brand "fresh pack whole kosher baby dills"
1 comment:
Rich. I am laughing at your ridiculousness. I love it.
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